Tuesday 17 July 2012

What do Parents Worry about?

A couple of weeks back, I attended a market research group with some other bloggers ahead of the BritMums Live conference.

It was a really interesting experience and I really enjoyed hearing other people's opinions on some meaty issues.

The main focus of the group was around the question 'as a parent, what do you worry about?'

Well.  Where to start?  I mean, once that little bundle comes into your life it seems you worry about everything.  I spend my life worrying.

I worry about the little things - did I lock the door, have I remembered to put suncream in my bag, can we cross this busy road safely...

I worry about the massive, depressing, head-hurty stuff - war; famine and disease.

And I worry about stuff in between.

Many of the mums in the group felt the main issues for them were financial.  In the current economic climate we're all fretting about making ends meet more so than ever before.

For me, it was hard to narrow down, so I picked one issue that does play on my mind a lot.  We were asked to bring an item or photo to illustrate our choice, and I brought a trashy, glossy celebrity magazine.

Why?  Well, having a daughter I fear for her being influenced by the media about body image and looks.  As a society we bombard our youngsters with impossibly airbrushed images of models and actresses and rather than give them something meaningful to aspire to, we are merely impressing on their minds that this unobtainable ideal of beauty is the key to success.

It makes me so angry that young girls feel they need to compete with these porcelain-skinned, hair-free, blemish-free, surgically enhanced celebrities.

I saw a tweet the other day from a mother of a 10 year old, horrified as she'd been contacted by her daughter's school and asked to shave her child's armpits because the other pupils were laughing at her. 

Speechless.

So, I'm curious.  What worries you as a parent?  What keeps you awake at night?  What niggles away at you?

Share your worries below in the comments section, and I will pick one of you at random to win a £25 amazon e-voucher.  The closing date is 5pm on Sunday 29th July 2012.  UK entries only please.

Disclosure: I received a financial payment for attending the market research focus group and for this follow up post.  All views expressed are my own.

EDIT:  This competition is now closed.  Thanks for all your entries - some of them broke my heart :0(

The winner picked at random was @clairelouise82 - please let me have your email address for the voucher.  

44 comments:

  1. I worry about everything. Right at the moment I'm worrying about Smallest who has a raging temperature. Big things involve the environment and world over population.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm shocked that the school chose to ask the mum to shave her daughters armpits instead of dealing with the bullying behaviour and educating the other pupils. Ten is much to young to be worrying about hair removal.
    It's a minefield - I worry about a lot - im a worrier!
    The biggest things for me are all about my children. The violence of the world disturbs me, and like you, war is always a worry. I also worry about their health - I had childhood kidney disease and my husband suffers with asthma - I pray my children are safe from both! I worry about their education and also about chemicals and pesticides in food and products! I try and avoid parabens, artificial Sweetners and go organic but that's difficult and expensive!
    Emma xx (twitter id @beachpebble)

    ... Bet you wish you'd never asked now! Ha ha xx

    ReplyDelete
  3. I worry about loads of stuff but mostly about safety, especially when my daughter is out on the bike with my OH - there are so many terrible drivers about.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I think my main worry is more about my ability as a parent. Am I doing enough to build the confident, happy children I hope for?

    ReplyDelete
  5. I worry about everything too although at the moment money is the biggest worry. I worry that my children aren't going to get the same opportunities as some of their class mates as we are not as well off as their families. I also worry a lot about the children's safety far too much!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I worry whether my 2 boys will be safe out and about in their teenage years what with all the knife crime. You can keep them safe when they are younger, but the older they get, the less control you have

    ReplyDelete
  7. I worry about their health and a little bit obsessed with making them eat fruit and veg. I worry about whether certain behaviors are 'normal and whether we are dealing with them correctly. But mostly I try not to worry especially about things I can't change!

    ReplyDelete
  8. When my children were young I worried about how good a parent I was and if I was doing things right. One of my children spent all their time studying and the other wouldn't do his homework.
    Now I spend my time worrying about my children worrying about their children because I know from experience it all works out well in the end.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I've worried endlessly about my family growing up and getting through the different milestones. Oddly I now worry about when I will have a grandchild - so things must go round in circles - I'm sure I'd just go through the whole worry process again with a new generation!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Everything, eating the right foods, teaching good behaviour, about letting them go, children - a constant source of worry for parents eh?

    ReplyDelete
  11. My worry is my son's safety as he gets older. Knife crime, motorbikes, etc. Difficult as have less control then.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I worry that I'm not providing enough entertainment/stimulation for my three year old. I don't like going to the park in general and hate those indoor play centres. I dread getting out paints, glues and glitters because of the impending mess. I worry that I'm not a good enough parent.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I worry about not doing enough for my toddler too! Right now I'm sat with 3 weeks to go until the next one arrives. I've let him nap because I'm exhausted and I know it'll ruin bedtime. He's watched about 7 hours of tv today and we've not been out. We baked some awful muffins and did some fingerpainting but that's it!
    I'm worried how I'll cope with 2 and have been having the horrendous anxiety nightmares that I remember from last time.
    Need to find a way to chill.....!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And I worry that I overstimulate him with too much when I do have energy lol! @cheepcheepcheep

      Delete
  14. I worry my girls will like me have MS. I would officially hate myself x

    ReplyDelete
  15. I worry about everything. I worry that they are happy. I worry that they are safe. I worry that I'll embarrass them when they are older. I worry that they watch too much tv. I worry that I shout too much. I worry if I am good enough. I worry whether they are going to get f'ing nits again at school. I am, as you might say, a bit of a worrier.

    ReplyDelete
  16. It's strange I worry about leaving them, u know dying. Yes I'm only 30 but with 3 kids one with autism, this scares the life outta me.
    @clairelouise82

    ReplyDelete
  17. I worry about them following in my footsteps. I have depression and have done so for twenty years or so. I'd hate to think that either of them could inherit this somehow.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I try really, really hard to not worry! I think so many of our worries only stress us out rather than doing good. Even when our worries eventuate sometimes we discover it's really not so bad - totally thinking of Ramona's broken leg!
    Things that keep niggling though - that she is eating/sleeping enough, that she is learning to love!

    ReplyDelete
  19. I worry about so much, from the big like will we ever afford to buy our own home to the little such a will my almost 5 year old be teased if I let him take a bob the builder toy into school when all the other children are into Ben10 and older things...

    ReplyDelete
  20. this worry may seem small but it can escalate in to bigger things I reckon - I worry that my children won't be liked/ won't fit in - I'd hate to think of them not having friends or being bullied and me to feel powerless about it.

    ReplyDelete
  21. I worry that my son will not stop hitting me, he doesn't hit his daddy and gives everyone else cuddles but never me unless he's unwell which is when he wants cuddles all the time from me. My worry at the moment though is his lack of speech and why the speech therapist hasn't called us yet.

    ReplyDelete
  22. I worry about loads but the main thing is money. I worry that I won't have enough money at the end of the month to feed my kids and put petrol in the car. @esthermate

    ReplyDelete
  23. like everyone, i worry about so much stuff, from whether he will be picked on at school or outside, to whether school will turn him into a drone, to whether i'll fuck him up somehow with my parenting methods, to whether he's eating enough fruit and veg to being hit by a car to me dying and leaving him all on his own to whether he will hate me for taking him away from his dad after he threw us across a room to whether there will be no NHS when he grows up to oh! just EVERYTHING!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Looking ahead, I worry about my kids as adults. My son can have a short fuse and I don't want him to be the type of lad getting into fights. I don't want my girls to be the type that drink behind ny back either. I thjnk I want the world to be different from when I was growing up but I don't think it will be. Thinking of now, I worry about my daughter at school. She's sensitive... I think i will worry no matter what but u have to let them live their lives
    XxX

    ReplyDelete
  25. I worry about lots of things but as they get older I'm worrying about boys, getting in cars with those boys and going out drinking with those boys!
    JoJo Young
    @BoostieBoo

    ReplyDelete
  26. I'm terrified of losing my little girl in a shop for example or her running out into the street and getting hit by a car, i'm just generally worried about her getting hurt in any way.

    ReplyDelete
  27. As a new mum I worried about bullying as I was bullied in school. I made friends with other 'bullied' kids and, as we went around together, we were'nt bullied any more.
    I taught my kids to look out for others and never to be afraid to tell an adult if something happened they were unhappy with.
    It got them both through school unscathed.

    ReplyDelete
  28. This is going to sound really bad, but I'm terrified that when Boo starts school he'll bully the other children.. He's tall and very strong for his age, I've always taught him to be nice to other people so rationally shouldn't worry about this. But he has started fighting with his little brother and they do hit each other quite hard. But then I also worry that he'll be bullied to.. pah.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I too worry about way too much! I worry about my children's future - will they fulfil their potential? will they be good people/ Will their be any jobs? I worry about my own ability as a parent contstanly but my biggest worry is always stranger danger.

    ReplyDelete
  30. I worry about everything. The sun, what food they eat, are they healthy, do they exercise enough....I think I need to lie down ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  31. Ahem.. lots of things: will my kids grow up being "nice"? Will they "get bullied"? And "Will they good jobs when they grow up"? Sigh.

    ReplyDelete
  32. I worry that I am not a good enough parent - that I don't play with him enough and that I spend too much time on the laptop.

    ReplyDelete
  33. I worry about my daughter's safety and happiness - that I won't make the right decisions when it comes to work/life balance and childcare.

    ReplyDelete
  34. I never thought I would be a worrier but since Wilf was born I worry about lots of things, from what food he eats to if he's getting enough stimulation!
    http://www.tigerlillyquinn.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  35. I worry that she'll not find supportive true friends and end up caring about the groups of two-faced nasty ones and want them to like her. I try to teach her the meaning of true friendship for herself and others. I want her to be happy.

    ReplyDelete
  36. I worry I'm not giving each child enough quality time, am I splitting my time between them evenly, have I favoured one child more than the other today?

    @littleboo_21

    ReplyDelete
  37. I'm not really a worrier but at the moment, the transition between primary school and high school is a big one for me as K had his lunch money stolen in the taster week there and it's really made him not want to go, I don't want to be an overprotective mum to an 11 yo but it's hard to know how to deal with it coz he's not a little kid anymore!

    ReplyDelete
  38. At this current moment in time I am worried that my little one isn't getting enough sleep. He's refusing to sleep & I'm crossing my fingers tight that it's just a phase!

    ReplyDelete
  39. Hi. I'm Kirsten and I work for the market research company behind the study behind this post! Thank you very much to you all for contributing; all your responses have been really helpful. As this is a new way of doing research for us, we're interested in finding out your views on it. In particular, we're keen to find out how instrumental the £25 prize draw was in your decision to contribute. And if you;d be happy to take part in this kind of market research in the future. I'd be really grateful if you would let me know your views privately at kirsten@theideaarchitects.com. Many thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Hi ,
    I worry about everyday things. My children safety,learning, food and happiness each day. Then i worry about much larger things. The planet, will they ever be able to buy a house, will they marry but most of all will they be happy in their lives. It hard work all this worrying what a waste of energy ??

    ReplyDelete
  41. I'm a bit of a worrier, although my main worry is that my kids dont grow up happy. Its my main concern, I want them to be happy with their lives and the direction they decide to take. I dont care what they become a cleaner, a lawyer, a chef or even a nose picker, lol as long as they are happy x @mamamakes

    ReplyDelete